Avoiding Unnecessary Conflict

One of the biggest mistakes couples make is having spontaneous, “in-the-moment” discussions about issues. Something our partner says or does triggers us and we feel instantly annoyed. Recently my wife and I were driving to a dinner party and when I glanced at...

Dealing With Difficult Emotions

I’ve been talking a lot lately about emotional reactivity, “triggering,” and how it’s the bane of intimate communication. It’s the main reason couples get into the “silence or violence” pattern. Don’t talk versus talk...